That, he doesn't have a ready answer for, and for a long moment he just sits, looking back at Neil, trying to puzzle his way through both that gaze and how it makes him feel.

And just what it is that he's actually doing.

Don't lie. Not about this.

"No," he says finally. "I don't wanna get out. But I don't..." He trails off, face briefly twisting in frustration. "I can't... live like this anymore. I can't live like I wanna live. Not as long as I'm still in."