The closest image he can find to what he's feeling is something melting, going from solid to liquid and entirely malleable and yielding--not that it would ever take him that much to get there, with Neil. But now he feels like he needs it more, moaning and gasping under Neil's mouth, loud even for him, and sounding almost like he's in pain.

And maybe it is a kind of pain.

He tenses when he feels the press of Neil's finger, but it's not unexpected and he makes himself relax, thinking not about melting but about openness, a cup or a bowl or something waiting to be filled up. Something made to be filled up.

And this could be the first time in a long time that he hasn't felt at all empty.