The sound he makes into the kiss is closer to a sob than anything else, and it takes him by surprise, making him feel a slight wave of embarrassment--because dammit, he shouldn't be this weak, no matter how strongly his instincts are leading him, no matter what he wants...

He wants this. He lets Neil fold him in half and disobeys then, because he can't not, reaching up and hooking an arm around the back of Neil's neck and pulling them even closer together, teeth against Neil's swollen lips and the taste of his own sweat on his tongue.