If nothing else, he's got a ticking clock at his back and it helps to spur him forward faster, less time to think. He moves to the edge of the bed, nudging Neil's legs apart with his knee and stepping between them, leaning down to slide both hands through his hair and tilt his head up and back.

It's close to rough. But it's not, really.

"I love you," he murmurs--still feeling his way around the words, still trying them out.