forthedog: (suggestive)
Mike Pinocchio ([personal profile] forthedog) wrote2013-03-26 07:28 pm
Entry tags:

It's arriving in a wave of violence, it's arriving with a loving embrace

Everything is fine. Everything should be fine, so everything is fine. That's what he's been telling himself. But it gets a little harder on the nights he wakes up tasting wet copper. Gets even harder when he understands that they aren't bad dreams.

This has always been about letting a dark part of himself out to play, going somewhere he really can't, not with anyone else, not with anyone willing. In that much, he supposes, there's always been an element of tension relieved, of release in the most primal sense. But now he's finding a new level of reassurance in the steady, even blows that pound a deep flush into Dean's upper back, the rhythm of the crop, the way it soothes. They're close to blood, though he hasn't gone anywhere near as hard as that first night and doesn't plan to, and tonight he thinks it might soothe him even more if he saw some.

In fact, yes.

He lays the crop down and picks up the knife, fingering the blade. It looks like a tongue of flame in the dim light, and for just a moment he's back there, deep in it, the pure dark and ash and the bloody fire and the simplicity of killing, and he's dragged face to face with how appealing it all is.

God, you are so fucked up.

Well. Yeah.
always_enduphere: (Grit.)

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-27 03:23 am (UTC)(link)
It doesn't hurt.

it doesn't. i'm not letting it, not beyond the occasional crack and smack, each one forcing another adorable gasp from dean's lungs.

it's not enough for him.

he ran here ready to claw off his own skin, and if the crop won't do that for him, maybe that knife will.


"Yeah." Dean twists in his restraints, and maybe he should be afraid of that look in Mike's eyes, but mostly he's hungry. The crop's not doing it and he's hungry. "Make me feel something, please."
always_enduphere: (Down.  [demon])

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-27 04:02 am (UTC)(link)
It stings, and Dean hisses his relief. He can feel the damage to his back, skin puffy and tight, but it doesn't hurt. Not like the cut does, even if, for a long moment, Dean wants it to cut deeper.

and mike just might. i started something at that party, restarted something. found a tall, steep slope and pushed and now he's sliding, sliding.

he could kill you.

he wants to kill you.

i push the thought to the forefront of dean's mind
.

"Thought we said no marks," he says, not moving but to breathe, but Mike is right. Dean doesn't care.

"What other rules you gonna break?"
always_enduphere: (Snap.  [demon])

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-27 04:30 am (UTC)(link)
"What if I didn't?" Dean asks, but he doesn't know why, stomach curling for the first time like it should. He doesn't want to know, definitely doesn't want to find out spread out and tied up.

"What if I never said it? Would you just keep cutting?"

Dean grins, wet and wide, and doesn't understand the words even as he says them, watching as if from somewhere far away. "I know what you did in the forest."
always_enduphere: (Black.  [demon])

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-27 05:09 am (UTC)(link)
i push the laugh from dean's throat, body rigid as a corpse - i need these eyes a little longer - and feel dean begin his now familiar crawl, edging away from the both of us, but i yank him back.

need you front and center for this, dean-o.


"All those sweet little woodland creatures," i say, and dean squirms hard, doesn't remember. i can feel the fear bloom down his spine like a cold winter storm. "Left in pieces. Would you eat me, too?"
always_enduphere: (Raw.)

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-27 05:47 am (UTC)(link)
"Hell no," i laugh again, and this time dean jerks so hard the blade nicks his skin and i have to tug his head away.

he's frightened, and from the depths i hear a thought too delicious not to give voice to, unstop his throat and let him speak.


"But if you had to," Dean says, panting, not sure how he'd ever caught his breath before this moment, "If it needed doing, you'd do it." He'd said he was fucked, but he was wrong, he was so wrong. This is more than fucked, this is more than depraved. "You'd kill me."
always_enduphere: (Unexpected.)

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-29 03:55 am (UTC)(link)
"Don't."

Dean's eyes are wide, and for a short, perfect moment, he feels entirely in control, but he can't believe that it will last. It never does, these days, and he'd thought that this would help but it isn't. Nothing's helping.

"Stop if you want, but don't undo the chains."

precious. as if they could stop me.

actually, i have a special request...


"Please just keep cutting me. I'll shut up."
always_enduphere: (Rack.)

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-29 04:23 am (UTC)(link)
It stings, and Dean leans into it, draws a halting breath that nearly chokes him when the pain winks out. "It does," he says, throat tight but it doesn't burn, his eyes wet but he can't feel it. "It has to."

oh dean. you've lost all your comforts. no dog, no hope of happiness with the angel. none of your blessed pain. it's all my fault, and soon, everyone will know it. until then...

let's crawl.


"Nothing else does, you're the only one who'll do it." Dean hears the pleading in his voice and doesn't care. "You know that."
always_enduphere: (Raw.)

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-29 04:58 am (UTC)(link)
"I can't."

Head tipped back, Dean watches Mike's hands, and the words slipping out of him feel like a warning and a promise. He can't. Can't hold on, can't hold this in, and though the yawning dark feels easier than anything that came before it, Dean digs in his heels.

Mike undoes the clasp, and Dean curls his fingers, determined to hang onto the chain. "Don't. You need to leave me here."
always_enduphere: (Snap.  [demon])

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-30 02:19 am (UTC)(link)
Dean twists his fingers in the chain, and between one breath and the next, his head fills with fire, black and roiling and rising like a wave that bears him downward. He can't hold on, and after a moment more, he doesn't try.

he hardly puts up a fight at all, now. so sick and so tired.

there we go. enjoy your sleep.

i calm dean's breaths, roll his head forward

and cast mike to the furthest wall with a thought, body landing spreadeagled and hard enough to
thunk.

"I believe he was talking about me."
always_enduphere: (Black.  [demon])

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-30 03:26 am (UTC)(link)
i flex dean's finger - oh hell, isn't it fair now to say it's mine? - my finger, and back to the wall mike goes, sore flesh pinned like a bug.

"Of course I am. Or perhaps...you don't know where the demons of my world come from."

smiling, i yank the chain free of the wall, letting it trail behind me as i approach him. "Did you imagine we're born in a vat of little black ooze? Fashioned from the soil? Or are we made?"

my eyes flood black and cold. "What's left when a soul is left in hell to fester, stripped and flayed and tortured until all its humanity is burned away?"
always_enduphere: (Snap.  [demon])

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-30 04:06 am (UTC)(link)
wax all rhapsodic.

i shape the words with relish, watch the corner of mike's mouth.

"Could you blame me?" i ask. "A demon's formative years are among his most delightful."

the bed isn't soft, but i cast myself onto it in an easy sprawl, hand casually possessive over the hilt of the knife. "You're well into yours."
always_enduphere: (Black.  [demon])

[personal profile] always_enduphere 2013-03-30 04:24 am (UTC)(link)
"To talk," i say, borrowing some of dean's old brightness. poor bastard probably hasn't sounded like this since he was fifteen. "Haven't had a real, face to face conversation in ages, and no, our chat by the bonfire doesn't count, you were tripping balls. But I did enjoy what you were selling."

pick up the knife, twist it in the dim light. he loves doing that.

"Ever considered just." i shrug. "Doing that on the regular?"